Three inmates at Guantanamo hung themselves today using nooses made of sheets and clothing. Military commanders have responded by calling on the administration to shut down Guantanamo because these deaths have revealed the cruelty of indefinite detention.
Oh wait . . . I read that wrong. They're responding by giving bed sheets to detainees only when they go to bed and removing them after they wake up in the morning.
Because who ever heard of a person hanging himself in the middle of the night?